Web Redemption - Crying Giants Fan

  • Season 1, Ep 113
  • 10/22/2009
  • Views: 77,992
0 comments

The only problem with Crying Giants Fan is that he cared too much. (4:17)

HAVE A SEAT.- THANK YOU, SIR.

- OH, I'M GLADYOU COULD COME OVER.

- NO PROBLEM.- IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEENA GIANTS FAN?

- I'VE BEEN A GIANTS FANMY ENTIRE LIFE.

- [bleep] MERRICK HILL,LAWRENCE TAYLOR,

ELI MANNING,THE DALLAS COWBOY CHEERLEADERS.

- OH.YOU'RE KILLING ME HERE.

- [laughs]- NO. LET'S GO.

YOU SEE, MY DIGNITYMEANS NOTHING

WHEN IT COMES TO THE GIANTS,SO I'M GONNA SAY

KILL THE CHEERLEADERS.- YES!

- MARRY ELI MANNING,AND [bleep] LAWRENCE TAYLOR.

- YOU'RE A FAN.YOU'RE A TRUE FAN.

THAT'S THE ONLY ANSWER.

HOW LONG AFTER THE GAMEWAS THIS VIDEO SHOT?

- OH, BOY, THIS WASA FULL NIGHT AFTERWARDS.

- THIS WAS THE NEXT DAY?- THE NEXT NIGHT.

- OH, THAT IS CRAZY.- YEAH.

- SEE, I WAS HOPING THIS WASMINUTES AFTER THE GAME WAS OVER.

- NO, I HAD TO DRIVEFROM THE BRONX,

FIVE HOURS UPSTATE,GET TO MY FRIEND'S HOUSE--

- TO BREAK DOWN.

WOULD YOU RATHER GOUNDEFEATED THIS YEAR

AND WIN THE SUPER BOWLOR CATCH OSAMA BIN LADEN?

- WHAT, ME PERSONALLYCATCH HIM?

- NO.- OH. UM...

- OSAMA GETS CAUGHT.

- UNDEFEATEDAT THE SUPER BOWL.

WITHOUT A DOUBT.

- WE'LL CATCH OSAMANEXT YEAR?

- YEAH, WE'LL GET HIMNEXT YEAR.

- OUR GOAL TODAY, THOUGH,

IS TO PREPARE YOUFOR A PRESS CONFERENCE.

- OKAY.

- BEFORE WE, UH,

GIVE YOU A CHANCETO REDEEM YOURSELF.

I WANT TO INTRODUCE YOUTO SOME PEOPLE,

GIVE YOU SOMEPROPER PERSPECTIVE.

- SOUNDS GOOD.- BRIAN, COME ON IN HERE.

BRIAN, ROBERT.

- NICE TO MEET YOU.- NICE TO MEET YOU, MAN.

- HOW MANY, UH, HOW MANY WINSYOU GET LAST SEASON?

WE HAD ZERO.WE HAD ZERO.

YOU GUYS--YOU GUYSARE IN THE PLAYOFFS?

- YEAH.- YEAH, WE HAD ZERO WINS.

ZERO.

WELL, YOU GUYS HAVEANY SUPER BOWL WINS?

- THREE.- YEAH, WE HAVE ZERO.

ZERO. YEAH.- ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU.

- THANK YOU.- GOOD JOB.

- THANK YOU.

- STOP CRYING, WUSSY.- I WILL.

- SCOTT, WHY DON'T YOU TELL HIMWHAT YOU WENT THROUGH LAST YEAR?

- YEAH, YEAH, I HAD A PRETTY BADYEAR LAST YEAR ALSO.

YOU KNOW, I HAD CANCER.

- WOW.- YEAH. YEAH, SO...

- ALL RIGHT, ROB,BEFORE WE GO OUT THERE,

I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE A REALLYGOOD VIDEO FOR YOU TO WATCH.

- HEY, ROB,OTTIS ANDERSON HERE.

WHEN YOU CRY, IT MAKESTHE WHOLE TEAM LOOK BAD,

SO STOP BEINGSUCH A [bleep] AND MAN UP.

- IT SEEMS LIKEGOOD ADVICE TO ME.

- ME TOO.

- OKAY, WE'RE GONNAGO OUT THERE.

- OKAY.

- THEY'RE GONNA BE ASKINGA LOT OF TOUGH QUESTIONS.

I WANT YOU TO BE RELAXED,I WANT YOU TO BE PASSIONATE,

BUT I DON'T WANT YOUTO BE EMOTIONAL.

- NO PROBLEM, NO PROBLEM.- YOU CAN DO THIS.

THE WORLD WANTS TO KNOW, ARE YOUREADY TO GIVE IT ANOTHER SHOT?

- LET'S GO.- LET'S DO THIS.

- LET'S DO IT.

[overlapping chatter]

- HEY, ROB, I WAS WONDERINGHOW YOU PLAN ON COMMEMORATING

THE GIANTS CHOKING INTHE PLAYOFFS AGAIN THIS YEAR?

- NEXT QUESTION.

- TECHNICALLY, THE PATRIOTS WEREA MUCH BETTER TEAM IN 2008,

EVEN THOUGH THE GIANTSWON THE SUPER BOWL.

HOW DO YOU RESPOND?

- THAT'S A GREATSPORTS QUESTION.

CAN WE HAVE A MAN READ THAT

SO WE CAN ACTUALLYTAKE IT SERIOUSLY?

- YOU LOST TO THE EAGLESAT HOME.

- THAT'S NOT EVEN A--

THAT'S NOT EVEN A QUESTION.

- UH, IF TIKI AND RONDE BARBERARE IDENTICAL TWINS,

HOW COME TIKI'S THE ONLY ONEWHO SUCKS [bleep]?

- WHAT TYPE OF WOOD

DO YOU THINK TOM KAUFMAN'S TEETHARE MADE FROM?

- DO YOU WATCH GAMES AT HOME,ALONE,

OR ALONE AT THE BAR?

- DAVE AND MEGAN ALMOST RHYMESWITH [bleep].

- [bleep]! YOU ARE JUSTA FAT, STUPID [bleep]!

- CLASSICO,YOU [bleep] ASSICO.

- NOW THAT GAMES ARE IN HD,IS IT EASIER TO MASTURBATE?

- WHY CAN'T YOU GROWA REAL BEARD?

- BILL SIMMS' KID IS A [bleep]!HAVE YOU SEEN HIM PLAY?

- HOW BIG IS YOUR [bleep]?

- IF YOU HAD ONE NIGHTWITH TOM COLLINS,

SPIT OR SWALLOW?

- TWO PART QUESTION.

ELI MANNING SUCKS ASSAND GO [bleep] YOURSELF.

GO [bleep] YOURSELF.

[slow speed]GO [bleep] YOURSELF.

- STOP THAT.[bleep] YOU, MAN.

YES. FALSE. NO.YOU ARE. YES. NO.

ABSOLUTELY. SWALLOW.YOU'RE A BITCH.

I THINK IT'S FALSE.[bleep] YOU. NO COMMENT.

I LIKE HIM.NEXT QUESTION.

HONESTLY,[bleep] ALL YOU GUYS.

- NO MORE QUESTIONS.

MY CLIENT HAS PROVEN THATHE'S NO LONGER A SISSY.

WE'VE GOT A GAMETO GO TO.

- GO, GIANTS!

GIANTS!- LET'S GO, BABY!

- GUESS WHAT WE'RE GRILLINGTODAY?

SOME BALD EAGLES!

THAT'S SOME GOODBALD EAGLE!

IT'S NOT DONE!RAW CHICKEN'S BAD FOR YOU!

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