Twitter Medical Advice - Uncensored

  • Season 4, Ep 415
  • 06/26/2012
  • Views: 38,305
0 comments

Daniel's not a doctor, but his free medical advice is more important than a doctor's because he has a TV show. (2:34)

>> Tosh: AND FINALLY, HAVE YOU

EVER HAD A MYSTERIOUS RASH BUT

WERE TOO EMBARRASSED OR POOR TO

SEE A DOCTOR ABOUT IT?

GOOD NEWS I'M GIVING OUT MEDICAL

ADVICE I'M NOT A DOCTOR BUT I

HAVE IMPORTANT INFORMATION AND I

ASKED TWITTER FOLLOWERS TO

DESCRIBE THEIR SYMPTOM AND I

GIVE ADVICE IN A NEW SEGMENT

CALLED TWEETMENT.

MY ANKLE HURTS.

STOP BEING A PUSSY AND IF THAT

DOESN'T WORK BUY YOURSELF AN

OTTOMAN.

EXCEPT FOR FOUR, NONE OF MY

[BLEEP] HAS BEEN SOLID FOR THE

PAST THREE WEEKS POOPING.

.

THERE'S NO DISRESPECT IN HAVING

ONLY FOUR A WEEK.

MY EYE TWITCHES ALL THE TIME.

I CAN FEEL IT BUT YOU CAN'T SEE

IT.

THERE'S LUPUS.

YOU WILL DIE ALONE.

NOW BUY AN EYE PATCH.

I THINK I MIGHT BE TOO CUTE.

I THINK THAT'S NOT A PICTURE OF

YOU.

MY FEET GET HOT AT NIGHT.

TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES AND SOCKS

BEFORE YOU GET INTO BED.

WHAT IF THEY WERE AT HOME GOING

HOLY [BLEEP], THAT WORKED.

THEN YOU WOULDN'T THINK MY

SUGGESTION WAS SO DUMB.

A COUGH, BUMPS AROUND MY LIPS

AND MOUTH, FEVER AND NOBODY

WANTS ME TO EAT THEM OUT WHICH I

AM VERY GOOD AT.

ALL RIGHT, I'M TAKING THIS

SERIOUSLY

YOU NEED TO GROW A GOATEE.

THAT WILL HIDE THE SORES AND

THEN ACT LIKE YOU'RE GOING DOWN

TO STARE AT IT AND THEN MUNCH

TIME.

WHEN DRUM LINE IS ON I HAVE TO

WATCH IT.

I'D BE WORRIED IF YOU DIDN'T

WATCH IT.

I HAVE A FETUS GROWING INSIDE

ANY BELLY.

DO NOT PANIC.

FALL DOWN SOME STAIRS AND TAKE

TAKE A WIRE AND JAM IT UP THERE

AGGRESIVELY AND JUMP IN A

JACUZZI, PREFERABLY SET OVER 120

DEGREES.

STEW IN THERE AS LONG AS

POSSIBLE.

ALL RIGHT, I'M DONE.

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