Web Redemption - Skateboarding Fail

  • Season 4, Ep 412
  • 06/05/2012
  • Views: 112,335
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Daniel wants to know if getting hit by a truck was the trick Serges Murphy was trying to pull off. (6:39)

- GET YOUR HAT.

HE'S FINE.THE SKULL IS NATURE'S HELMET.

THAT'S SERGE,AND HE SHOULD THANK THAT TRUCK

FOR HELPING HIM MAKETHE ONLY WATCHABLE SKATE VIDEO.

SKATEBOARDING WAS INVENTEDBY MARTY MCFLY IN 1955.

BACK THEN, IT WAS ACTUALLYCOOL AND DANGEROUS.

NOW, EVERY KID WITHA SINGLE PARENT IS DOING IT.

SKATING HAS YETTO GO MAINSTREAM

BECAUSE NO ONE WANTSTO WATCH IT.

THEY CAN'T EVEN GET FUEL TVTO AIR IT,

AND THEY SHOW UFC WEIGH-INS.

I WATCHED THE "X" GAMESFOR THE SAME REASON

PEOPLE WATCH BULLFIGHTING.

I WANNA SEE YOU DIE.

SKATERS THINK THEY'RE AWESOME.

BUT REALLY, THEY'RE JUST LIKEANY OTHER GROUP OF NERDS

WHO HAVE THEIROWN SECRET LANGUAGE

AND WEAR COSTUMES.

HOW IS DOING AN OLLIE-HEELFLIPAND DRESSING LIKE A HIPSTER

ANY DIFFERENT THAN SPEAKINGKLINGON

AND WEARINGA STORMTROOPER COSTUME?

STORMTROOPERSDON'T SPEAK KLINGON!

I GET IT.

SKATING IS FOR CHILDREN.

TELL THE OLD DUDEAT THE SKATE PARK

HE IS CREEPING EVERYONE OUT.

IF YOU DON'T HAVE A SHOE DEALBY THE TIME YOU'RE 14,

YOUR WINDOWHAS OFFICIALLY CLOSED.

THERE IS 0% CHANCEYOU'LL BECOME THE NEXT TONY HAWK

AND 100% CHANCE YOU WILL HAVENON-FUNCTIONING ANKLES

BY AGE 20.

NO HOBBY CAN POSSIBLY BETHAT GREAT

IF YOU'RE SURROUNDEDBY RAZOR SCOOTERS ALL DAY.

THE ONLY AMAZING TRICK YOU CANPULL OFF ON A RAZOR SCOOTER

IS MANAGING TO GO FIVE MINUTES

WITHOUT HAVINGYOUR SEXUALITY QUESTIONED.

I DO LIKE THAT SKATEBOARDERSARE FEARLESS

AND WILLING TO GET BEAT UPOVER AND OVER

UNTIL THEY GET IT RIGHT.

KINDA LIKE ANYONE WHO'S EVERDATED MATTHEW FOX.

IT WAS A MIRACLE THAT SERGEWASN'T KILLED BY THAT TRUCK,

SO I HAD HIM AIRLIFTEDTO HOLLYWOOD,

WHERE DOING RAILS MEANSSOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT,

IN THIS WEEK'S WEB REDEMPTION.

HEY, WHAT'S UP, SERGE?THANKS FOR MEETING ME HERE.

- GATE WAS LOCKED.

- THAT'S 'CAUSEIT'S NOT MY HOUSE.

NOW GET IN HERE.THIS BOWL IS SO FRESH.

SERGE, WHERE ARE YOU FROM?- BOSTON.

- ALL RIGHT, WALK ME THROUGH

EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENEDIN THAT VIDEO.

- FILMING A TRICK, SKATING.

- WERE YOU PLANNING ON DOINGANYTHING ELSE?

- NO, THAT WAS THE END.

- OH, SO IT ACTUALLY ENDEDPRETTY MUCH RIGHT ON TIME.

- YEAH.

- WHEN YOU GOT UP,DID YOU EVEN CONSIDER...

CALLING THE PHONE NUMBERON THE BACK OF THE TRUCK

TO REPORT HIS DRIVING?

- NO, I DIDN'T.

I ONLY SAWTHE FRONT OF HIS TRUCK.

- HOW FAR DID YOU FLYTHROUGH THE AIR?

- APPROXIMATELY 25 FEET.

- DID YOU EVER MEET THE GUY?- UM.

- I'M SORRY, DID YOU EVER MEETTHE ASIAN WOMAN?

- NO, HE CALLED THE AMBULANCE.

- AND THEN HE JUST LEFT?- PRETTY MUCH.

- WOULD YOU BE SHOCKEDIF HE WAS HERE?

- YES.- ME TOO.

WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO BEWATCHING FOR TRAFFIC?

- NO ONE WAS,BUT SOMEONE SHOULD'VE BEEN.

- YOU WERE JUST LIKEHOPING THAT WHEN YOU FLEW

THROUGH AN INTERSECTIONTHERE'D BE NO CARS?

- I'D DONE IT ONCE BEFOREAND I RODE ONTO THE SIDEWALK.

AND THEN I JUST WENTINTO THE STREET THAT TIME.

- DID YOU GET HURT?- LITTLE BIT.

CUTS AND BRUISES.

- BUT YOU DIDN'T BREAKANY BONES?

- NO BROKEN BONES.- DID YOU GO TO THE HOSPITAL?

- I WENT TO THE HOSPITAL.- DID YOU HAVE INSURANCE?

- YES.

- DID YOU VOTEIN YOUR LAST ELECTION?

- JUST GOT REGISTERED.- YOU JUST GOT--

ARE YOU GONNA VOTE THIS TIME?- THINK SO.

- IT'S GONNA BE EXCITING,ISN'T IT?

- YEAH.- OH, YOU GET IN THAT BOOTH.

YOU PULL YOUR PANTS OFFAND YOU PICK ONE.

YOU CAN DO WHATEVERYOU WANT IN THERE.

THEY'RE NOT ALLOWEDTO ASK QUESTIONS.

DID YOUR PARENTSSEE THE VIDEO?

- YEAH.

- WHAT'D THEY THINK?

- THEY DIDN'T REALLY REACTLIKE I THOUGHT THEY WOULD.

- HOW'D THEY REACT?

- JUST KINDA LIKE"OH, THAT WAS CRAZY."

NOT LIKE FREAKING OUTOR ANYTHING.

- WHY DOES EVERYONEWANT YOU DEAD?

- I DON'T KNOW.

- THIS IS WHAT I WOULD'VE DONE.

BUT AGAIN,I'M FROM A DIFFERENT ERA.

I WOULD'VE JUMPEDOFF MY SKATEBOARD

OVER THE TRUCK,HAD MY SKATEBOARD GO UNDERNEATH,

AND I WOULD'VE LANDEDON THE OTHER SIDE.

- HIPPY JUMP.

- YOU DIDN'T EVEN CONSIDERDOING A HIPPY JUMP.

- NO.

- THAT ACCIDENT MAKE YOU WANNASWITCH TO ROLLERBLADING?

- NOT A CHANCE.

- WHAT'S YOUR BEEFWITH ROLLERBLADERS?

- HORRIBLE.

- WHAT DO THEY CALL THEMSELVES?

DO THEY CALL THEMSELVES INLINERSOR ROLLERBLADERS?

- FRUIT BOOTERS.- WHAT?

- FRUIT BOOTERS.- FRUIT BOOTERS?

THAT SOUNDSLIKE A HATE CRIME...

ALTHOUGH I DO LOVE ITAND I'LL PROBABLY USE IT

FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.- YEAH, DEFINITELY.

- IS THAT THE FIRST TIMEYOU'VE EVER BEEN HIT BY A CAR?

- YEP.

- YOU EVER BEENIN A CAR ACCIDENT?

- MM-HMM.- YOU A GOOD DRIVER IN SNOW?

- JUST DRIVE SLOW.

- OR YOU DO WHAT I DO.

GET YOURSELF A SUBARU OUTBACK,ALL-WHEEL DRIVE.

THOSE THINGS CAN HANDLEANY TYPE OF WEATHER.

THAT'S FOR SURE.

HAVE YOU SKATEDTHAT RAIL SINCE?

- NO. I DON'T THINKI'M EVER GOING BACK THERE.

- YOU'VE GOT TO.

YOU GOTTA GET BACK UPON THAT RAIL.

- HEY, HEY, YOU KIDS!

HOW MANY DAMN TIMESI GOTTA TELL YOU

TO QUIT DRAINING MY POOL?

NOW FILL IT BACK UPOR I'M CALLING THE POLICE!

- YOU ALWAYS BEEN THIS CRANKY,OLD MAN HAWK?

- YOU KIDS ARE WASTINGYOUR LIVES.

NO ONE'S EVER MADE A LIVINGRIDING A SKATEBOARD.

NOW GET!- SUCK IT!

I KNOW A MUCH SAFER PLACEFOR US TO RIDE ANYWAY.

LET'S GO!

SERGE, WELCOMETO MY CHILDISH DREAM FACTORY

FOR YOUNG BOYS ONLY.

- LOOKS A LOT LIKETHE FANTASY FACTORY.

- UH, NO, IT DOESN'T.

THIS IS MY OWN ORIGINAL IDEA

THAT I HAD YEARS AGOBEFORE HE DID.

I WAS JUST TOO BUSYWITH OTHER PROJECTS

TO SEE IT THROUGH.

THIS PLACE IS AWESOME.

IT'S GOT EVERYTHINGYOU COULD EVER WANT

IF THE ONLY THINGYOU EVER WANTED

WAS TO HANG OUTWITH 12-YEAR-OLD SHIRTLESS BOYS.

YOU CAN SCOOTER,PLAY BASKETBALL--

GOOD SHOT, PHILIP!

OR MY FAVORITE,THE FOAM PIT.

THAT FOAM LOOKS INVITING.ARE YOU GONNA JUMP IN?

- I'LL STICK TO SKATING.

- SUIT YOURSELF, BUT I INSISTYOU DON'T WEAR A HELMET.

THESE BOYS LOOK UP TO YOU,

AND I WANT THEIR HEROTO BE COOL.

IT'S REALLY HOT IN HERE,

SO I WANNA MAKE SUREYOU STAY HYDRATED.

LET ME FIX YOU A DRINK.

- THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

- JASON.

ALL RIGHT, SERGE, LAST CHANCETO TAKE THAT SHIRT OFF.

IT LOOKS REALLY ITCHY.- I'M GOOD.

- YOUR LOSS.

GO HAVE FUNWITH THE BOYS.

AND REMEMBER,THERE'S NO CARS IN HERE,

SO YOU SHOULD BE PRETTY SAFE.

- FUCK.

[Daniel laughing]- OH, NO!

I SEE YOU METMY PARTNER IN CRIME BIG SAC.

YOU JUST TOOK 200 POUNDSOF BALLS TO THE FACE.

YOU GOT SACKED!THAT'S WHAT'S UP.

[grunts]

DRAMA, YOU GOTTA SEE THIS!

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