Prom Proposals - Uncensored

  • Season 5, Ep 514
  • 05/07/2013
  • Views: 62,080
0 comments

Daniel responds face-to-face to some prom invitations he has received. (3:51)

- HEY, KRISTEN STEWART,MY NAME IS CODY,

AND I HAVE BEEN A FAN OF YOURMOVIES FOR A VERY LONG TIME.

AND MY QUESTION TO YOU IS,

WILL YOU GO WITH METO MY JUNIOR PROM

IN THE SPRING OF 2013WITH ME?

AND IF YOU DO NOT SEE THIS,

EVERYONE WHO ELSETHAT DOES SEE THIS,

PLEASE GET THIS VIDEOAS FAR AS POSSIBLE,

'CAUSE, OF COURSE, I WANTKRISTENTEWART TO SEE THIS.

- WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO BRINGKRISTEN STEWART TO YOUR PROM?

SHE'LL END UP DITCHING YOUHALFWAY THROUGH THE NIGHT

TO BANG YOUR PRINCIPAL.

EVERY YEARAROUND THIS TIME,

I GET BOTH FLATTEREDAND OVERWHELMED

BY THE THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDSOF PROM INVITATIONS I RECEIVE,

JUST LIKEBACK IN HIGH SCHOOL.

I THOUGHT THAT, AS A COURTESY,I WOULD RESPOND FACE-TO-FACE

TO A SELECT FEWOF THOSE REQUESTS.

FIRST UP IS MEYONCE.SHE WRITES...

HO HO!

I WILL NOT GO TO PROMWITH YOU

UNTIL GAYS CAN LEGALLYGET MARRIED IN ALL 48 STATES.

I DON'T CARE ABOUT HAWAIIOR ALASKA.

ANNEMARIE WANTS TO GOTO PROM WITH ME.

LET'S MEET HER.

- HI, DANIEL.- HEY, I ONLY HAVE ONE QUESTION.

IF I ACCIDENTALLY GET YOUPREGGERS AFTER PROM,

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DOWITH THE BABY?

- KEEP IT AND TAKEALL YOUR MONEY.

- OH, WRONG ANSWER,ANNEMARIE.

I'M NOT GOING TO PROMWITH YOU.

OKAY, NOW WE HAVE ALINA.

IF I AGREE TO BE YOUR DATE,

WHAT ARE WE GONNA DOAFTER PROM?

YOU GUYS RENTINGA LAKE HOUSE OR SOMETHING?

- NO. I HAVE A HOT TUB.

- THAT SOUNDS NICE.WHAT DO YOU SET IT AT?

- 103.- NNNH.

MORE OF A WARM TUB.- [laughs]

- I'M A 106 MAN, MYSELF,

SO I WILL DEFINITELY NOTGO TO PROM WITH YOU.

I'M SORRY.- COME ON.

- NO.

- YOU HAVE TO FEEL PITYFOR ME.

MY BOYFRIEND AND IJUST BROKE UP.

YOU HAVE TO.- ALL RIGHT.

WELL, WHAT IF IGET YOU PREGNANT?

WHAT WILL YOU DOWITH THE BABY?

- PROBABLY ABORTION.[laughs]

- THAT IS NOT FUNNY.

AND THAT IS NOT YOUR CHOICETO MAKE. SO, NO.

NEXT, IT'S TAYLOR,WHO SAYS...

RADNOR?

LET'S TALK TO HER.

- HI, THANKS FOR HAVING ME.

- OKAY, YOU ARE DEFINITELYIN MY WHEELHOUSE.

UH, WHAT'S YOUR HIGH SCHOOLPOCY ON STATUTORY STUFF?

- I DON'T KNOW.

LENIENT, I GUESS.YOU KNOW.

- LOOKS LIKE RADNOR MIGHT BEGETTING MY SLOPPY SECONDS.

I'LL DM YOU.

NEXT, IT'S WILL,WHO WRITES, "REMEMBER ME?

"ABOUT EIGHT MONTHS AGO,I TOLD YOUR WHITE ASS

"TO BE AT THE BEST PROMIN AMERICA.

MAY 18TH,YOU IGNORANT PIECE OF SHIT."

LET'S TALK TO WILL.

HEY, HAVE YOU EVERASKED A DUDE TO PROM BEFORE?

- UH, NO, THIS WILL BEMY FIRST TIME, ACTUALLY.

- OH, VIRGIN!

I'M NOT GOING TO PROMWITH A VIRGIN.

- AH, YOU'RE A BITCH.

- YOU'RE A BITCH.- [laughs]

NEXT UP IS CASSIE.

- HI, DANIEL.THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME.

- HOW OLD ARE YOU?

- I'M 17.I'LL BE 18 JUNE 5TH.

- I HOPE YOUR PROMIS JUNE 6TH.

- IT'S NOT.

- ALL RIGHT. THEN, NO.

- UM, WELL,THAT SUCKS,

BUT, UM, THANK YOU FORAT LEAST TALKING TO ME

AND GETTING MY HOPES UP.

LIKE,THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

- YOU'RE WELCOME.

AND STOP LETTING MEWALK ALL OVER YOU!

[laughter]

FINALLY, WE HAVE HUNTER.

- OH, MY GOD!

- OKAY, NO.

- HI!

- NO ONE SHOULD EVER BETHAT EXCITED TO SEE ME.

- [laughs]AW, THAT'S NOT NICE.

- WELL,WELCOME TO MY SHOW.

I THINK THE LESSONTO BE LEARNED HERE

IS TO QUIT TRYINGTO GUILT CELEBRITIES

INTO GOING ON DATESWITH YOU.

IF NOBODY AT YOUR SCHOOLWANTS TO TAKE YOU,

WHAT MAKES YOU THINKI'D HAVE ANY INTEREST?

BY THE WAY, MY HIGH SCHOOLREUNION'S COMING UP,

AND MILA KUNIS,I'D LOVE YOU TO BE MY DATE.

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