June 21, 2011 - Heavy Metal Club

  • 06/21/2011

The Heavy Metal Club gets a Web Redemption, Daniel takes on the world's fastest wiffle ball pitcher, and America embraces the sport of crackhead tossing.

[MUSIC]

>> IT WAS EITHER LET THEM PLAY

OR HAVE THEM SHOOT UP THE

SCHOOL.

CLEARLY, THEY MADE THE WRONG

CHOICE.

>> THAT WAS THE METAL CLUB AND

LIKE EVERY OTHER HEAVY METAL

BAND, THEY SUCK.

IT ALL SOUNDS THE SAME -- JUST

THREE CHORDS AND YELLING LIKE

COOKIE MONSTER.

IF I WANTED TO SEE DUDES SWEAT

AND SCREAM FOR A COUPLE OF

HOURS, I'D WATCH GAY PORN.

WHICH I DO.

METAL IS ALL ABOUT GIMMICKS.

YOU KNOW WHY

YOU KNOW WHY TEGAN AND SARA

DON'T HAVE TO CRAP ON A BIBLE OR

VOMIT A GALLON OF BLOOD?

BECAUSE THEIR SONGS ARE LOVELY.

I COULD NEVER BE A TRUE METAL

FAN SINCE I CAN'T WEAR ALL BLACK

EVERY DAY.

MY WARDROBE DEMANDS A SPLASH OF

COLOR.

THOUGH IT WOULD SAVE A TON OF

TIME SORTING LAUNDRY -- ANOTHER

LOAD OF DARKS.

>> AND STOP PLAYING SONGS

BACKWARDS.

SATAN DIDN'T HIDE ANY MESSAGES

IN THERE FOR YOU.

[SPEAKING GIBBERISH]

>> SURE, MOSHING IS A GREAT WAY

TO BURN OFF THOSE EXTRA CALS

BUT NOTHING GOOD HAPPENS WHEN

THAT MANY ANGRY WHITE PEOPLE GET

TOGETHER.

>> HAVEN'T WE LEARNED ANYTHING

FROM GERMANY OR THE SOUTH?

METAL'S NOT THE GLORIOUS ART

FORM IT USED TO BE.

EVEN THE PRINCE OF DARKNESS HAS

TO SPEND HIS DAYS WITH AN AWFUL

WIFE, 17 TINY DOGS AND AN UGLY

DAUGHTER

WHO BRAGS ABOUT HOW MUCH WEIGHT

SHE LOST BY NOT GETTING THE LAP

BAND SURGERY.

>> YEAH, RIGHT.

>> BUT, LACK OF TALENT BE

DAMNED, YOU CAN'T BLAME THE

METAL CLUB FOR TRYING TO PUT ON

A GOOD SHOW.

>> THAT'S WHY I WENT TO SEATTLE,

FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY, IN THIS

WEEK'S WEB REDEMPTION.

[DRUMS]

>> WHOA.

WHOA.

WHOA.

>> OKAY.

I APOLOGIZE FOR CRASHING INTO

YOUR BAND PRACTICE.

NOW I KNOW WHY KURT KILLED

HIMSELF.

IT'S THE HAIR IN THE MOUTH THAT

GETS IRRITATING AFTER A WHILE.

>> HOW BIG IS YOUR BAN.

OUR CLUB IS 12 PEOPLE

ALTOGETHER.

>> IT STARTED OUT WITH ABOUT 30.

AND THEN EVERYBODY QUIT.

>> WHAT WERE WE WATCHING IN THAT

VIDEO.

YOU WERE WATCHING OUR CLUB DOING

A MEDLEY OF METAL FOR ELEMENTARY

SCHOOLERS.

WHY DIDN'T THEY WATCH YOUR

MUSIC.

WHAT TUNE WERE YOU PLAYING.

>> EIGHT DIFFERENT SONG.

>> WHAT I HEARD WAS ONE CAT

HURTING ANOTHER CAT.

>> IT WAS EIGHT SONGS.

>> HAVE YOU EVER TAKEN MUSIC

LESSON.

WE'VE BEEN A CONCERT BAND

TOGETHER FOR FOUR YEARS.

>> HOW ABOUT SINGING LESSONS.

>> NO.

>> WHY DO YOU GO WITH TWO

VOCALISTS AND ONE GUITAR.

IS IT UNFAIR THAT THOSE KIDS

HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT AS THEIR

FIRST CONCERT EVER.

>> OURS IS BETTER THAN SOME OF

THE OTHER ONES.

>> DO YOU THINK THAT YOU GUYS

WERE DOING A GOOD JOB.

>> THE ONES AT THE HIGH SCHOOL

WENT WAY BETTER.

>> I'VE ALWAYS SAID THE SAME

THING.

ARE YOU UPSET YOU AREN'T INSIDE

A HOT TOPIC RIGHT NOW.

>> DO YOU WORSHIP SATAN.

>> I DO.

>> WHY DO YOU WORSHIP SATAN.

>> THEY ACCEPT EVERYBODY.

>> IT'S REBUT THE TALENT IS

THERE.

THAT'S WHY I'M GOING TO FLY YOU

TO HOLLYWOOD AND GIVE YOU A

CHANCE TO PERFORM ON THE SUNSET

STRIP.

>> AWESOME.

>> IT'S PRETTY EXCITING.

I'M ALSO GOING TO BE YOUR

MANAGER.

THAT WILL ENTITLE TO ALMOST ALL

OF THE EARNINGS.

>> WELCOME TO THE ROXIE, BOYS

AND GIRLS.

>> WHY AREN'T YOU PARTYING, AND

DRINK.

>> WE DON'T DRINK.

>> YOU'RE NOT OLD ENOUGH FOR

GROUPIES.

>> MY APOLOGIES TO THE GIRLS.

>> ENJOY FELLOWS.

>> WHAT ABOUT ME.

>> MOST LIKELY YOU AND I WILL

END UP TOGETHER.

I'M NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT EITHER.

>> TO SEX, DRUGS AND ROCK AND

ROLL.

DOES ANYBODY READ MY WRITER.

I DON'T LIKE BLUE M & M'S.

>> WHO'S READY FOR SOME HAIR

WIND.

>> OKAY.

I GOT ONE NEEDLE SO WE'RE GOING

TO SHARE.

>> ALL RIGHT.

KNOCK IT OFF.

GET OVER HERE.

LET'S HAVE A PRAYER.

DEAR JESUS THANK YOU FOR

EVERYTHING THAT YOU'VE DONE FOR

US.

GIVE US A GREAT SHOW TONIGHT.

LET US ROCK LIKE WE'VE NEVER

ROCKED BEFORE.

THANK YOU FOR THE WONDERFUL

CHEESE PLATTER THAT WE

DESTROYED.

ALLOW EVERYONE THAT COMES TO

TONIGHT'S PERFORMANCE BE BLESSED

BY OUR MUSIC.

MAKE SURE THAT THE VALET DOESN'T

STEAL ANYTHING FROM MY CAR.

MAKE SURE THAT GIRLS DON'T CATCH

ANYTHING VAGINALLY.

>> IN YOUR NAME WE PRAY, AMEN.

>> AMEN.

>> LET'S DO IT!

[CHANTING]

>> IF YOU CAN'T ENTERTAIN.

YOU'VE GOT YOUR WORK CUT OUT FOR

YOU.

YOU READY TO GIVE IT ANOTHER

SHOT.

>> YES.

>> LAY AN EGG.

[SCREAMING]

[SCREAMING]

>> WHOO!

>> NOT AGAIN.

>> I DON'T CARE.

>> I HAVE NO OBJECTION TO THIS

NEXT VIDEO.

FLOPPING ON THE COURT.

THAT MUST BE MANU JENOVI'S MOM.

LET'S PUT 20 SECONDS ON THE

CLOCK, AND SEE HOW MANY FUNNY

COMMENTS WE CAN MAKE.

I HAVEN'T SEEN ACTING THIS GOOD

IN A COURTROOM SINCE LAST WEEK'S

FRANKLIN AND BASH.

SHE NEEDS TO HIRE FRANKLIN AND

BASH.

ACTUALLY MAYBE JUST BASH.

FRANKLIN'S A BIT OF A WILD CARD.

>> EVEN THE COURT REPORTER ON

FRANKLIN AND BASH WROTE, "WHAT A

[BLEEP]."

>> I HAVEN'T SEEN HIJINKS LIKE

THAT SINCE FRANKLIN AND BASH

SHOWED UP TO THE COURTROOM IN

BATHING SUITS.

>> IF FRANKLIN & BASH KEEP

GOOFING OFF, MR. BELDING IS

GOING TO COME IN AND YELL,

"HEY, HEY, HEY, WHAT IS GOING ON

HERE?"

LATER SHE WAS AWARDED $17

MILLION DOLLARS.

NICE WORK FRANKLIN AND BASH

YOU GUYS DONT LIKE FRANKLIN ANDBASH...

OVERRULED!

I LOVE THE WAY HE LIES.

THIS NEXT KID NEEDS TO CHANGE

HIS DIAPER.

ROH-ROH.

SCOOBY'S GOT A REAL MOUTHFUL.

>> SEEMS LIKE HE'S WAY TOO OLD

TO BE IN A DIAPER.

>> YOU COULD THROW THIS BABY

DOWN A WELL AND GET LIKE A

MILLION WISHES.

>> HE HAS A WEIRD TOOTH FAIRY.

>> I'M NO JIM CRAMER, BUT HIS

UNDERWEAR HAS A PHENOMENAL

INTEREST RATE.

HIT THE BULLHORN.

THAT'S WHERE I KEEP MY MONEY.

SHARE SOME CHANGE.

OH, HOLD ON.

>> LET ME SEE.

I GOT SOMETHING FOR YOU.

HERE YOU GO.

>> YOU'LL BE GOOD BOY TO YOUR

NEW HOMELESS DADDY.

>> HEY, THANKS.

>> DADDY.

>> NO PROBLEM.

THEY'RE GOING TO BE HAPPY

THE DRIVER TO SETTLE OUT OF

COURT.

>> I HAVE A NEW FAVORITE SPORT.

IT'S WHERE YOU SEE HOW FAR YOU

CAN THROW A CRACKHEAD.

>> GOOD TO SEE THE OAKLAND

RAIDERS STAYING IN SHAPE DURING

THE LOCKOUT.

>> OKAY, TECHNICALLY, THE

CRACKHEAD HAS TO STICK INTO THE

GROUND FOR THE THROW TO COUNT.

>> THIS IS THE ONLY SPORT WHERE

THE EQUIPMENT IS ON DRUGS.

>> HE'S ALSO PRETTY GOOD AT

BOUNCING CHECKS.

>> NICE THROW.

WINNER GETS A BJ FROM THE

JUNKIE.

>> WE'RE NOT SO DIFFERENT.

WE HAVE SIMILAR COMPETITIONS IN

MY NEIGHBORHOOD.

GOOD SHOT SON.

YOU OUTDROVE ME AGAIN.

THANKS DAD.

YOU'RE REALLY SUPPORTIVE.

REMEMBER.

DON'T EVER DO CRACK.

NO WAY.

>> ALRIGHT, TURNS OUT OUR

NEIGHBORHOODS ARE PRETTY

[playing percussion riff]

>> HEY, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA,

WHOA!

OH!

WHAT?

WHAT ARE YOU--

>> I'M TRYING TO DO--

>> WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

>> I'M TRYING TO DO THE MUSIC

WORLD A FAVOR.

OKAY, I APOLOGIZE FOR CRASHING

INTO YOUR BAND PRACTICE.

IT IS A BEAUTIFUL DAY HERE IN

SEATTLE.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU GUYS LIVED IN

SEATTLE?

>> ALL MY LIFE.

>> FOREVER.

>> ARE YOU GUYS ALL SENIORS IN

HIGH SCHOOL?

>> YEAH.

>> HIGH SCHOOL SUCKS.

>> ABSOLUTELY.

>> NOW I KNOW WHY KURT KILLED

HIMSELF.

THE HAIR IN THE MOUTH, IT GETS

IRRITATING AFTER A WHILE.

WHAT'S THE NAME OF YOUR BAND?

>> METAL CLUB.

WE'RE NOT A BAND.

>> HOW BIG WAS YOUR BAND?

>> OUR--OUR CLUB IS--

>> CLUB.

>> 12 PEOPLE ALTOGETHER.

>> IT STARTED OUT WITH ABOUT 30.

>> AND THEN EVERYBODY QUIT,

AND NOW WE'RE 12.

>> AND NOW EVERYBODY WANTED BACK

IN.

>> THEY WEREN'T IN IT FOR THE

LOVE.

>> EXACTLY.

>> HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR

SOUND?

>> THE ONE IN THE VIDEO WAS JUST

GOD AWFUL.

>> YEAH.

>> EVERYTHING THAT COULD'VE GONE

WRONG, WENT WRONG THAT DAY.

>> WHAT WERE WE WATCHING IN THAT

VIDEO?

>> YOU WERE WATCHING OUR CLUB DO

A MEDLEY OF METAL FOR ELEMENTARY

SCHOOLERS.

>> HOW OLD WERE THE KIDS THAT

WERE IN THAT AUDIENCE?

>> KINDERGARTEN TO SIXTH.

>> "K" TO 6.

>> WHY DIDN'T THEY LIKE YOUR

MUSIC?

>> WHEN WE GOT THERE, THEY TOLD

US TO TURN OUR METAL PERFORMANCE

INTO A POP PERFORMANCE.

IT WAS TOO SCARY.

>> IT'S HARD TO FEED OFF THE

ENERGY OF A CROWD WHEN IT'S

CHILDREN.

>> MM-HMM.

>> AND THEY'RE ALL--

>> ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'RE

BORED.

>> WERE YOU EMBARRASSED

PERFORMING IN FRONT OF

ELEMENTARY KIDS?

>> WE DIDN'T CARE.

>> YEAH, NO.

NO.

WE WEREN'T EMBARRASSED UNTIL

AFTER IT WAS CAPTURED ON VIDEO.

>> YEAH.

>> DID THEY ASK YOU BACK?

>> AFTER THE PERFORMANCE,

WE'VE HAD A FEW OTHER SCHOOLS

REALLY WANT US TO GO AND PLAY

THERE.

>> HOW MANY CDs DID YOU GUYS

SELL AFTER THAT SHOW?

>> WE DON'T HAVE CDs.

>> WHAT SONG WERE YOU GUYS

PLAYING?

>> EIGHT DIFFERENT SONGS.

>> SO WHAT I HEARD WASN'T JUST

ONE HORRIBLE CAT FUCKING ANOTHER

CAT.

THAT WAS EIGHT SONGS.

>> YEAH.

>> DID PEOPLE PICK UP ON THAT?

>> THEY PICKED UP ON A FEW OF

THEM.

>> I THINK SOME OF THEM WERE SO

BAD, THEY WERE JUST SO

INCOHERENT.

DID YOU GUYS EVER--YOU'VE

PRACTICED THIS MEDLEY, YES?

>> YEAH.

>> OKAY, WHO WRITES THE LYRICS

TO YOUR SONGS?

>> I KIND OF JUST MAKE 'EM UP AS

I GO.

>> ROCK AND ROLL.

HAVE YOU EVER TAKEN ANY MUSIC

LESSONS?

>> YEAH.

WE'VE--WE'VE BEEN IN CONCERT

BAND TOGETHER FOR FOUR YEARS.

>> HOW ABOUT SINGING LESSONS?

NO?

>> DEFINITELY NOT.

>> WHY DO YOU GO WITH TWO

VOCALISTS AND NO GUITAR?

>> WELL, I WAS ONLY SUPPOSED TO

DO ONE PART OF THE SINGING,

AND THEN EVERYONE THAT WANTED TO

SING DROPPED OUT.

SO WE GOT STUCK DOING ALL OF IT,

AND THEN YOU CAN SAY ABOUT THE

GUITARIST.

>> OH, THE GUITARIST.

I WAS IN A BAND WITH BOTH OF THE

GUITARISTS THAT WE HAD

ORIGINALLY, AND THEY BOTH QUIT

WITHIN THE LAST WEEK BEFORE

THE PERFORMANCE.

>> THE DAY OF THE DRESS

REHEARSAL.

>> WHY DO YOU THINK THEY QUIT?

DRUGS?

>> 'CAUSE THEY THOUGHT WE

COULDN'T DO IT.

>> HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR

VOICE?

>> BAD.

>> IT'S LIKE AN ANGEL.

>> YEAH, LIKE AN ANGEL.

>> LIKE IF SHE WAS LITERALLY

FALLING FROM HEAVEN.

>> TO HELL.

>> MORE LIKE HITTING THE FLOOR.

>> HEAVEN TO HELL.

>> ARE YOU THINKING OF REPLACING

THE GUITARIST.

>> NO.

>> NO, I LIKE IT LIKE THIS.

>> YEAH, THIS WORKS OUT NICER.

>> YEAH.

>> ALL THEY DID WAS COMPLAIN

AND COMPLAIN AND COMPLAIN THE

WHOLE TIME.

>> WHAT ABOUT THE SOUND?

YOU KIND OF--YOU KIND OF NEED

A GUITAR IN ROCK, DON'T YOU?

>> WE MAKE IT WORK.

>> [laughs]

THAT IS DEBATABLE.

[laughter]

IS IT UNFAIR THAT THOSE KIDS

HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT AS THEIR

FIRST CONCERT EVER?

>> OUR ACT WAS BETTER THAN SOME

OF THE OTHER ONES.

>> AND HOW OLD WERE YOU GUYS

WHEN YOU STARTED LIKING METAL

MUSIC?

>> PROBABLY FRESHMAN,

EIGHT GRADE, SEVENTH GRADE.

>> SO YOU CAN UNDERSTAND--

YOU UNDERSTAND WHY THEY WEREN'T

INTO IT.

>> OH, YEAH.

>> THE SEED HASN'T BEEN PLANTED,

BUT YOU MIGHT HAVE PLANTED THAT

SEED IN A FEW PEOPLE.

AND I'LL BE HONEST, IF YOU WATCH

THAT VIDEO CLOSELY, YOU SEE ONE

PERSON.

>> THERE'S ONE KID.

YUP.

>> DO YOU GUYS THINK YOU WERE

DOING A GOOD JOB?

>> NO.

>> NOT ON THE VIDEO.

>> THE ONES AT OUR HIGH SCHOOL

WENT WAY BETTER.

>> MIDDLE SCHOOL PERFORMANCES

WERE THE BEST, THOUGH.

>> MIDDLE SCHOOL WAS THE BEST.

>> YOU GET THE MOST ENERGY FROM

MIDDLE SCHOOL KIDS.

I'VE ALWAYS SAID THE SAME THING.

ARE YOU GUYS UPSET THAT YOU

AREN'T INSIDE A HOT TOPIC RIGHT

NOW?

>> NO.

I DON'T EVEN SHOP AT HOT TOPIC

ANYMORE.

>> "ANYMORE."

>> THEY SOLD OUT.

>> THEY SOLD OUT.

>> THEY SOLD OUT?

WHEN DID THEY SELL OUT?

I DON'T WANT TO HEAR THIS.

>> LIKE, FIVE YEARS AGO.

>> HOW MANY ROADIES DO YOU GUYS

HAVE?

>> EIGHT.

EIGHT, EVERYONE ELSE IN THE

CLUB.

>> I GUESS SO.

YOU COULD THEM ROADIE.

>> DO YOU WORSHIP SATAN?

>> I DO.

I HAVE A PENTAGRAM RING.

>> WHY DO YOU WORSHIP SATAN?

>> BECAUSE IT'S THE ONLY

RELIGION THAT ACCEPTS EVERYBODY.

>> I THOUGHT--I THINK

CHRISTIANITY ACCEPTS EVERYBODY,

DON'T THEY?

>> NO.

>> THEY DON'T?

>> GOD--DOESN'T GOD LOVE

EVERYONE?

>> NOT GAY PEOPLE.

>> WELL.

BESIDES THEM.

>> IN THE CHURCH OF SATAN,

ANYONE CAN GO AND PRAY.

>> NO, THAT'S GOOD.

I'M GLAD THAT THE CHURCH OF

SATAN WELCOMES THE GAYS.

I THINK THAT'S NICE.

PLEASE EXPLAIN HOW, WITH METAL,

ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.

>> THAT SPEECH.

>> OH, GOD.

>> WOW.

>> YEAH.

WE NEEDED TIME BEFORE WE

PERFORMED FOR MATT TO SET UP HIS

DRUM SET, SO WE HAD TO JUST

TALK, AND THEN I MADE--WE WROTE,

LIKE, A LITTLE SPEECH, AND

EVERYONE AGREED WITH WHAT IT

SAID, AND THAT'S WHAT IT WAS.

>> WE DIDN'T FIGURE IT WOULD BE

VIDEOTAPED AND THEN PUT ALL OVER

THE INTERNET.

>> YOU DON'T REALLY BELIEVE

THAT, DO YOU?

>> NOW WE DO.

>> YEAH.

>> THAT IS A SCARY MANTRA.

[laughter]

YOU'RE CLEARLY REALLY TALENTED.

IT'S RAW, BUT THE TALENT IS

THERE.

THAT'S WHY I'M GONNA FLY YOU TO

HOLLYWOOD, GIVE YOU A CHANCE TO

PERFORM ON THE FAMOUS SUNSET

STRIP.

>> AWESOME.

>> IT'S PRETTY EXCITING.

I'M ALSO GONNA BE YOUR MANAGER,

SO THAT WILL ENTITLE ME TO

ALMOST ALL OF THE EARNINGS.

>> WHAT'S NEXT?

SEE THE BULLET.

YES, SIR.

NOW READY.

>> ARE YOU WILLING TO DO THIS?

>> DIDN'T REALIZE IT WAS REDNECK

SEASON ALREADY.

>> DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.

NOW YOU CAN'T SUE US OVER THIS

WEEK'S BREAKDOWN.

>> IN THE BIBLE BELT, A KEVLAR

VEST IS CONSIDERED FORMAL WEAR.

AND THESE APPALACHIAN EINSTEINS

HAVE COME UP WITH A SURE-FIRE

WAY TO TEST WHETHER THEIR

BULLETPROOF VEST IS ACTUALLY

BULLET PROOF.

>> MAN, THIS IS SO DANGEROUS.

I MEAN, WITH ALL THE LITERATURE

OUT THERE TODAY, WHY WOULD

ANYONE BE SMOKING?

>> ARE YOU WILLING TO DO?

>> YEAH, OF COURSE HE'S WILLING

TO DO THIS.

GUNS ARE VERY PERSUASIVE.

JUST TRY POINTING ONE AT A BANK

TELLER.

>> I WAS ROOTING FOR A HEAD

SHOT.

>> HE TAKES A LITTLE STROLL

AROUND HIS BEAUTIFUL PROPERTY.

WHAT IS THAT?

A 3 SHACK, 2 AND A HALF CRAPPER?

>> YOU GUN CONTROL LOBBYISTS CAN

SUCK IT.

I DON'T WANT TO LIVE IN A

COUNTRY WHERE BIG GOVERNMENT

SAYS I CAN'T SHOOT MY BUDDY AT

NEAR POINT BLANK RANGE.

>> COME ON, NOW.

THAT'S JUST CHILDISH.

>> BUT THAT IS A GOOD LESSON FOR

YOU YOUNGSTERS: AFTER YOU SHOOT

SOMEONE, IT'S IMPORTANT TO WORK

THE BODY.

HOLY COW.

WOW, MAN.

DID I HIT YOU.

>> SHOT THROUGH THE HEART, AND

YOU'RE TO BLAME

YOU GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME.

>> WAS THAT A SKI JACKET?

>> HOW YOU DOING.

HANG 10.

HANG 10.

>> HE'S NOT EVEN ALIVE, HE'S

JUST RUNNING ON METH AT THIS

POINT.

>> DON'T WORRY, I'M SURE THERE'S

GO TO OUR BLOG FOR MORE DETAILS.

>> AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR VIEWER

MALE.

>> A STAPLE OF EVERY BAD

TELEVISION SHOW.

HOW CAN WE POSSIBLY MAKE THIS

BIT DIFFERENT AND GAY?

I'LL TELL YOU HOW.

OUR VIEWER MALE IS JUST ME

CHECKING OUT OUR MALE VIEWERS

I ASKED YOU TO RECORD YOURSELVES

WATCHING MY SHOW

>> HE SEEMS TO BE ENJOYING IT.

>> AND THIS MAN HAS DREAMY EYES.

>> I DON'T APPRECIATE ANYONE

LAYING SHIRTLESS ON A LEATHER

COUCH.

YOU FALL ASLEEP, YOU ROLL OVER

AND IT HURTS.

>> THIS SEEMS LIKE A VERY FUN

GROUP.

>> DAMN YOU, TEAM SIX.

YOU KILLED OFF ONE OF OUR MOST

IMPORTANT VIEWERS.

I HOPE HE DIDN'T HAVE A NEILSEN

BOX.

>> YOU KNOW, WHAT JUST OCCURRED

TO ME RIGHT NOW?

YOU'RE WATCHING ME, WATCHING

YOU, WATCHING ME.

MINDFREAK!

>> WAY TO COMMIT TO THE BIT, YOU

TWO.

>> SADLY, NONE OF THEM WERE

LAUGHING OR BLACK.

NOT GOOD.

>> ALRIGHT

>> MEET WIFFLE BOY, THE BEST

WIFFLE BALL PITCHER IN THE

WORLD, WHICH WILL OPEN UP ZERO

DOORS FOR HIM IN LIFE.

BUT I DON'T GIVE A CRAP HOW

RIDICULOUS THOSE PITCHES ARE, I

CAN TAKE ANYONE DEEP.

NICE TO MEET YOU WIFFLE.

ACTUALLY IT'S SEAN.

>> PREPARE TO BE EMBARRASSED.

>> YOU WANT A COUPLE OF WARMUPS.

ONE OR TWO.

>> AM I EXPOSED.

>> WHO.

HANG 5.

WHY YOU THROWING CHANGEUPS.

BRING THE HEAT.

I'LL TAKE MY BASE.

>> OH!

AH!

>> I GOT TO GET A DIFFERENT BAT.

>> PRETTY IMPRESSIVE SEAN.

NOW I'M GOING TO SEE IF YOU CAN

STRIKE OUT THREE OF MY PLAYERS A

TEAM 3.

TWO OF THEM ARE LATINO.

>> YOU EVER SEE THE MOVIE

WANTED.

DON'T WORRY, IT'S NOT IMPORTANT.

>> THE ONLY THING I REGRET DOING

WAS WEARING MY DOLCE & GABBANA

SUNGLASSES.

IT'S THE FACE.

WE'RE OKAY.

>> DON'T SHARE THAT.

I WONDER IF D & G IS GONNA DO

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