Tosh.0 Blog

Yeah 'Right'

Posted by: Matt Koff | April 2, 2013 at 1:00PM

OK, which one of our ex-girlfriends wrote this sign?

[via Unnecessary Quotation Marks]

From Around the Web

Seems Legit

Posted by: Matt Koff | February 28, 2013 at 11:00AM

"That's a quote from my neighbor. He kills kids."

[via "Blog" Of "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks]

Don't 'Mind' If I 'Do'

Posted by: Matt Koff | January 23, 2013 at 3:00PM

The first draft of this sign was "Please Ejaculate In Our Video Store."

[via Unnecessary Quotes]

The Quotes Say It All

Posted by: Mike Pomranz | March 4, 2011 at 4:00PM

I put "RESTROOMS" in quotes because technically it's the janitors' break room, but feel free to piss in there because I'm pretty sure one of those assholes stole my iPod touch off of my desk.

[via I Can Has Internets]

I 'Was' A Fat Slob

Posted by: Chris Lesinski | October 29, 2009 at 10:00AM

"getting ripped OFF in 4 weeks"

Not that banner ads are known for their accurate depictions of truth and reality (typically they involve conning suckers into playing the easiest flash game ever created in an attempt to sell travel packages), but the specific banner ad seen above is just egregious.

fat-slob-picWhat's with the before and after pics?

"4 weeks later I was bigger and buffer and — oh yeah — I also shaved my chest and got about a decade worth of tattoos all over my arms."

What was this guy thinking? Sleeves? All the fat must've gone from his stomach to his head. If you're going to show off your sexy new chest with a killer swastika tat on your left pec, that's one thing, but you can get sleeves even when you are a "fat slob."  In fact, comparing the two pics, the arms are the one body party that doesn't even look that different.  Screw the weight loss, you coulda just gone with the sleeves, man!

But that logic would assume that these two pics are the same person, and, they obviously aren't.

[via Woosk]