Tosh.0 Blog

Sick Of Eating Actual Babies, You Monster?

Posted by: Matt Koff | January 15, 2013 at 1:00PM

Congratulations, it's a burrito and you're going to die at 40.

[via Break]

IF You Know What We Mean

Posted by: Matt Koff | January 15, 2013 at 11:00AM

Kind of like how I "wear" a condom with my girlfriend. (Never wear a condom and try to pull out most times. Sorry, Karen.)

[via Izismile]

I Read That In The Kama Sutra

Posted by: Matt Koff | January 14, 2013 at 6:00PM

So far, my loose tongue has only gotten me into floppy, 44-year-old, divorced places.

[via The Chive]

Why Are There So Many Clocks In This Cock Store?

Posted by: Matt Koff | October 23, 2012 at 3:00PM

That lamppost was placed there by a giggling fourteen-year-old boy.

[via Izismile]

We Are Literally COVERED In Amusements

Posted by: Matt Koff | October 19, 2012 at 11:00AM

Should I feel bad that my semen is only partially air-conditioned?

[via Acid Cow]

How'd They Do That?

Posted by: Matt Koff | October 10, 2012 at 10:00AM

Apparently my uncle started a theme park?

[via Izismile]

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