It was really big of you to invite the ex-wife.
Very few people know that scorpion venom tastes like vanilla..
Do something you won’t regret. Go see Daniel live on tour.
Save some of that ferocity for your wedding night, little lady.
This election year feels like we're living in an episode of Drunk Future. Minus the robots.
Sir? Would you mind moving? A billionaire wants to sit down.
[via The Chive]
No, it's not worth it.
That's why I got my degree from a parking garage.
And look at me now… Tosh.0 blogger. Boom goes the dynamite.