Crabs are gone!
[via Lol He He He]
Very few people know that scorpion venom tastes like vanilla..
Do something you won’t regret. Go see Daniel live on tour.
Save some of that ferocity for your wedding night, little lady.
This election year feels like we're living in an episode of Drunk Future. Minus the robots.
“There’s only one way to get this man to stop pushing us… I must turn my body into a weapon.”
You can probably sew those shorts right back up, but he'll never be able to get his asshole back.
“Just tape it up, bro. I paid for an hour on the tramps and plan on using it all. “
And the sand box is full of fire ants but don’t let any of those tiny issues prevent you from having a good time.
[via Rad Ass]