Very few people know that scorpion venom tastes like vanilla..
Do something you won’t regret. Go see Daniel live on tour.
Save some of that ferocity for your wedding night, little lady.
This election year feels like we're living in an episode of Drunk Future. Minus the robots.
His anaconda don't want none unless you're made of 100% cotton, hun.
"If you're going inside, grab me a bag of Cheetos, a slushy, nachos, those little powdered donuts, three Slim Jims, a roll of Bubble Tape, some Mentos, and a lotto ticket. Ooh, and a Diet Coke." — Slimer
Since you spend all day on the Tosh blog, here's what you're missing on the rest of the web:
Can't tell if this makes me horny or hungry. Maybe horngy.