Tosh.0 Blog

Check Out The Wheels On Her

Posted by: Matt Koff | March 4, 2013 at 2:00PM

Serious question: Do you take this to a mechanic or a gyno?

[via Acid Cow]

Oppressively Low Prices

Posted by: Matt Koff | August 28, 2012 at 5:00PM

The other stores are doing a great job of pretending to not be Jewish.

[Via Izismile]

Tags: 

hitler

mall

motorcycles

nazis

store

World War II

wtf

Dark Riders Wanted

Posted by: Joselyn Hughes | November 9, 2009 at 10:00AM

riders

When your Sunday evening includes having to eat leftover carryout, a loss by your favorite football team and the season finale of your favorite television show, there's not many places to turn to feel better outside of Reddit's "WTF" page.
Because honestly, WTF?!

My Sunday night may have been a downer, but not after I stumbled upon this Craigslist gem "Looking for 8 other Dark Riders (Tallahassee)."

I'm looking for 8 (eight) other motorcycle riders to start a bike clan. We will be known as "The Nazgûl"

It doesn't really matter what kind of bike you have or what color it is. Black is preferred though. However "The Nazgûl" does not accept scooter riders. Tough luck. Go start a hobbit clan with your little scooters.

Duties include: Wearing black cloaks wherever we ride; Exuding an aura of death to all nearby vehicles on the road. Optional duties include: Whispering "Shire… Baggins…" to any nearby pedestrians when stopped at a red light, replacing your horn with a loud screech that induces fear and hopelessness, and equipping yourself with a sword (I have a broadsword. It's no Morgul blade, but hey, it works.).

We won't ever ride in the rain, because the dark riders don't like water; its also a safety concern. I myself, have a black gsxr 600 and been riding for about 13 months. I don't have a cloak yet, but If I get enough of you nerds together, then I'll make one.

As far as choosing our "Witch-King", I think we should vote based on a combination of who has the most wicked bike and who gets into character the best. "DO YOU NOT KNOW DEATH WHEN YOU SEE IT, OLD MAN?!"

But BEWARE! For the Witch-King cannot be slain by the likes of any mortal man; however it is possible that a woman in her Mitsubishi Eclipse, who happens to be texting her BFF, may not see you when she rear-ends you…

I'll never complain about reheated Pad Thai or say a bad thing about Florida or the people of Tallahasee ever again. Thank you, Reddit. I feel so much better.

Tags: 

BFF

bikes

cloaks

eclipse

motorcycles

old man

reddit

riding

scooters

wind

witch-king

wtf

Guy Dumps Two Bottles of Energy Drink into His Motorcycle

Posted by: Mike Pomranz | May 21, 2009 at 11:55AM

On Tuesday, a user calling himself "sti2gsxr" put the following post on Gixxer.com – "a forum dedicated to the Suzuki GSX-R motorcycles."

gixxerpost

One page later, forum members determined he had not poured NOS Fuel Cleaner into his bike, but instead had filled his tank with NOS Energy DrinkForty-eight pages later (as of posting time), Gixxer has set new records for visitors and temporarily had their site crippled (and is looking more like a 4chan board).

If the tale is true, this guy is a complete idiot, and if it's fake, this guy is a total loser with way too much time on his hands. Your classic lose-lose situation.

What do you think?  Master fail or master troll?

[via Reddit]