I was too high to watch the Oscars. James Franco was too high to host the Oscars.
Unfortunately, only one of us got a photo op with Oprah out of the deal. (That's from James Franco's Twitter. Yes, he was tweeting during the Oscars — and looking very high while doing it.)
Gawker did a great job handpicking some quotes from Oscar reviews alluding to Franco's accused state:
"Heavy-lidded and smirky" (The Washington Post); "A tad bewildered" (Moviefone); "Mellow" (Entertainment Weekly); "Distant [and] uninterested" (The Hollywood Reporter); "Distracted" (Los Angeles Times); "Bored" (BBC); "[In] a haze" (Time); "Preparing for a remake of Dazed and Confused" (USA Today).
To be fair — "bored," "uninterested," "distracted" — he was at The Oscars, the most boring 4-hour-plus event on television. Why would I wait the length of a movie to see an award being given to a movie I didn't see?
That's exactly why I didn't watch them. Still, from what I've heard, putting the always loopy Franco next to the super-straight edge Anne Hathaway made for an interesting pairing.
Next year's hosts: Dakota Fanning and Charlie Sheen on mushrooms!
That should… do… something… [shrug]