This miserable bastard has 155 years of blue balls built up.
[via The Chive]
We like to make our dinner feel very important before violently murdering it.
Do something you won’t regret. Go see Daniel live on tour.
At least she doesn't have to deal with dry elbows in the winter.
And with that, he packed up his dreams of being able to walk again.
Since you spend all day on the Tosh blog, here's what you're missing on the rest of the web:
It’s Dorothy’s 100th birthday party and she wanted to celebrate with all of her friends.
Told you Brad and Angie were just cyborgs modeled after two Russians who died in 1846.