I'd like to make an official motion that all news stories be animated and retold by the Taiwanese. They're just so much better at it than we are.
Where we see an old man's dick, they see a loaded handgun. And where we see a piece of meat, they see an actual piece of meat. The imagery is stupendous!
I would watch CNN all day if it were this good. But it's not. So I'll stick to be completely uninformed about world events.
Now what's all this I hear about a dead bird in Arkansas?